My exit interview with MailChimp and why I’ll send a million emails a year with a new ESP

many chimpanzees working on computers

This part of the post was published August 6th, 2019

Question:

My email list upload has been rejected to the list info_507995

This list was exported from our e-commerce web site of customers who have
purchased from us
Attachment (1): (A CUSTOMER list)

support
11 days ago
26 Jul, 2019 at 21:18:17
Hello,

Thank you for contacting GetResponse.

I’m sorry to hear you are having issues with your account.

In order to look into this issue for you, can you please provide the email address login of
the account in question, as well as the last four digits of the card on
file for the account?

This is to ensure that you are the account owner so that we can share account information with you.
# 28033922 / Response / Support Panel Message was sent to customer. To: [email protected]
action
11 days ago
26 Jul, 2019 at 21:18:17
Status change to: Answered
Answered
# 28033923 / Action / Support Panel
[email protected]
customer
5 days ago

Hello,

Thank you for the reply.

I forwarded your message to our Compliance Team
and asked them to get back to you as soon as possible.
# 28053672 / Response / Support Panel Message was sent to customer. To: [email protected]
action
4 days ago
02 Aug, 2019 at 08:14:52

Hello,

You have reached GetResponse Compliance Team.

We regret to inform you that we will not be able to import this
contacts list.

For more details, please refer to the following information:
=============================================

Our system has detected the following problems with your import:

* Policy issues. This indicates that a significant portion of your email
list contains undesirable email addresses which, if mailed to, would create reputation
and deliverability issues for all customers using our platform.

There are many types of problematic email addresses that would fall
under ‘policy issue’ category:
– bounces, invalid domains, user unknown errors
– internal/external blacklists
– frequent complainers
– spam traps
– certain role addresses
and more.

Usually, this indicates that the list has poor quality, isn’t permission-based or has gone “stale”. If you believe that your list is
permission-based, we recommend that you first clean your list with a service like BriteVerify:

http://www.briteverify.co.uk/?pcode=getresponse

 

— Can I get more information about why my import was rejected? —

GetResponse uses a proprietary abuse detection system called Hydra, which
analyzes billions of data pieces in real-time (email addresses, subscriber
activity, message content, user behavior and more) and makes automated
decisions based on AI algorithms that are always adapting.

Because of the proprietary nature of Hydra and because it is always
adapting due to its AI algorithms, regrettably it is not possible for us to
provide additional information about why your import was rejected (outside
of the information above).

Please note that – although your import was rejected – your account is
still open and we will accept new list imports from you.

Please note that further rejected imports may have a negative impact on your account’s
standing, so we advise to fix the problem before initiating new imports.

 

We are not judging your list, or your business, however there are very
strict anti-spam rules and algorithms used by email service providers that
we must respect.

This is crucial to maintain a level playing field for all
our customers, and to ensure best sending environment for all.

Thank you for your understanding.

Actually, you do not have my understanding.

I’ve been doing digital marketing since 2003 when I started sending out emails.

I’ve sent out more than 10 million emails on a half a dozen ESP’s.

Your Artificial Un Intelligence Machine Hydra is giving you false positives because I scrubed the list manually as I have done so for 16 years.

Something similar occurred on MailChimp which is why am now with getresponse apparently a poor decision in retrospect.

30 minutes prior to scheduling an email that has not missed a single Sunday and seven years I received this message from MailChimp:

“Our automated abuse-prevention system, Omnivore, has detected an action or content in your account that may be in violation of our Acceptable Use Policy.

For more information on these violations, please review our Acceptable Use Policy”.

I was blocked from sending through MailChimp and I onboarded with GetResponse throughout one long Friday night and Saturday morning.

At least MailChimp was professional enough to work through the issue then sent the following message

Thanks for reaching out to us regarding your account status, and we apologize for the delay in response.

Our automated abuse prevention system, Omnivore, detected content, keywords, or activity that can indicate the possibility of harmful information being sent through our service.

Upon review, however, we can see that the account is fine and as a result has been reinstated for continued sending. At this point, you should be good to go.

Please keep in mind that as a strictly permission based service, Mailchimp can only support sending to subscribers who have directly subscribed to your mailing list through a confirmable process (i.e. in writing), or directly purchased a product/service from you in the last 12 months. Additionally, if permission was given more than a year ago, then a bulk email must have been sent to them and not objected to within the past 12 months.

Apparently GetResponse is just going to dig in its heels citing the new Ubiquitous customer service mantra “the customer is always wrong.”

 

And yes you are “judging my list”, isn’t that what AI is supposed to do “judge if the data is acceptable or not?

Have you or your software team given any thought to the words you’ve used to communicate to me?

As a “communication” company, you do a lousy job of communicating.

Just because you believe we have been communicating, there is no proof communication has occurred.

This part of the post was published February 4th, 2019

 

We blog about pet bird care all original G rated content plus usually a “parrots in the news” curated post.

 

File under “you’ve been warned”

 

I wrote this note to our readers 2/1/19 about 11:30 PM CST

 

A zygodactyl footnote from mitchr.

 

Approximately 30 minutes prior to sending this Birdie Brunch out, the following message popped up in MailChimp

 

“Our automated abuse-prevention system, Omnivore, has detected an action or content in your account that may be in violation of our Acceptable Use Policy.

Continue reading “My exit interview with MailChimp and why I’ll send a million emails a year with a new ESP”

Why the Yoast SEO readability score is a bunch of cow dung.

man typing on PC with the WordPress logo on the screen

Update: (9/1/20)

In March of 2017 I emailed Yoast support that their readability score “is a bunch of cow dung”.

Today 3-1/2 years later  I got this response from Yoast.

“Hi Mitch,   

Thank you for your continued patience. You contacted us regarding a bug where Readability shows orange when gibberish text is used in a table. This email is to inform you the bug has been fixed so please make sure that you’ve updated your Yoast SEO plugin to the latest version v14.8.1.

Let us know if there’s anything else we can assist you with; we’re happy to help.

I’m now using RankMath (pro) on all our sites.

It’s a much better value than Yoast.

Why the Yoast SEO readability score is a bunch of cow dung.

Here’s how I know.

I’ve been blogging for 10 years (building sites for 18).

I’m no Ernest Hemingway but I’m reasonably articulate and have several hundred thousand social media followers.

When I started seeing poor readability scores I began to test.

Continue reading “Why the Yoast SEO readability score is a bunch of cow dung.”

Why are banks and insurance companies ignoring the eCommerce market?

Isolated dinosaur and monster model in white (dinosaur, rex, tyrannosaurus)

To my insurance agent

Could you send us something that explicitly states we are covered against legal action if a customer’s pet bird gets sick or dies and we are the target.

The customer will have paid us via credit card, PayPal &/or Apple Pay also – we need insulation against future forms of electronic payments – thank you

Continue reading “Why are banks and insurance companies ignoring the eCommerce market?”

How many developers and partners does it take to build a Zen Cart/WordPress hybrid website?

2 men working on a tablet and smart phone

I read these mind numbing posts on LinkedIn groups.

“18 steps to better digital marketing” “the five things you must do to launch a website”

Really? When Rick Fisher of BookwormComputers and I had our fateful discussion Christmas week 2015 little did I know that it would take eight months to deploy the new website. The problem was I had moved the site six times and continued to apply digital duct tape with each move.

Continue reading “How many developers and partners does it take to build a Zen Cart/WordPress hybrid website?”

Politics and swimsuit babes should be the cornerstone of LinkedIn so get over it grumpy old white guys

angry white guy wearing blue shirt and red tie

Stick me with a fork I’m done – the sanctimonious social media cops need to understand that LinkedIn is a platform made of two parts SOCIAL & MEDIA

 Bikini mogul http://www.bikiniluxe.com/ Candice Galek runs a company that sells bikinis – and she posts swimsuit models on LinkedIn – hoping to SELL more Bikini’s – hmmmm – so these grumpy old men are saying these swimsuit models don’t belong on LinkedIn because they clearly prefer to look at pictures of more grumpy old men – what is wrong with you? 

“Politics should not be on LinkedIn” and yet – Salesforce CEO Marc Benioff proclaims 3rd political party of CEO’s (google it) 

Continue reading “Politics and swimsuit babes should be the cornerstone of LinkedIn so get over it grumpy old white guys”

Let’s define “LinkedIn professional” once and for all

mitch Rezman wearing headset in front of several computers

I keep seeing this theme on LinkedIn – “there’s a bikini-clad model that’s not “professional” this is LinkedIn and bikini clad models don’t belong here”

Businessmen shouldn’t wear backpacks – that’s not professional (sure you’re much better off with a $600 Tumi briefcase telegraphing that you are toting $1000 worth of electronics)

“Politics doesn’t belong on LinkedIn this is a professional networking platform”

yet

Continue reading “Let’s define “LinkedIn professional” once and for all”

How Obamacare is punishing my business & me

octor acting like he is going crazy

I’m type II diabetic – I see my physician four times a year – I’ve been seeing the same Physician for 14 years. Dr. J is tall good-looking – smart as a tack and always makes sure I’m in top health.

Before the recession I was paying $400 a month for a Blue Cross Blue Shield policy that pretty much paid out nothing. For a few years I gave it up.

When I would visit the good Dr. just prior to leaving I would present my debit card and I would be charged $52 for that visit.

Continue reading “How Obamacare is punishing my business & me”

Running a fowl of copyright law

statue of justice with parrots perching

I sell bird toys – on the face of it it shouldn’t be that hard. Under the hood it’s hardest thing I’ve ever done in my life.

We’ve had a retail facility burn to the ground. We’ve had another retail facility flood with sewer water because of improper plumbing practices.

We’ve had another facility where the landlord blocked our loading dock with several thousand boxes of documents for months – the loading dock was the only reason we took the space to begin with.

Continue reading “Running a fowl of copyright law”

Patent trolls the scam that just keeps on taking.

trolls

A while back we received a letter from an attorney asking us to take down 4 images from our website on behalf of their client whose products we were no longer selling.

I’m busy and we have 75,000 images on the site. I did not know nor care what this lawyer was talking about and I kept asking them to tell me which 4 images to remove. 

Weeks later I get an email with the URLs of the four images – we removed them – I thought that ended things.

Continue reading “Patent trolls the scam that just keeps on taking.”

A personal warning to 3000 LinkedIn connections from mitchr

Homer Simpson having a meltdown

I really don’t give a RA (rats ass) about grammar – Look at what texting has done to the English language and tell me the English language of the 21st century looks anything like that of the 20th century.

this for Mitchell J Katz

Senior Public Affairs Specialist at Federal Trade Commission – Commented, 10 days ago

“Apparently, you don’t check for spelling, grammar, and punctuation errors, however. Period at the end of a sentence, anyone?”

Continue reading “A personal warning to 3000 LinkedIn connections from mitchr”